Balance is Perfection

I have to tell myself most days that this life isn’t about being perfect. It’s not about the pursuit of perfection. It’s about all the little things you do each day that you think don’t even matter, that add up to a life well lived.

I realized at the end of last week that my eating wasn’t perfect by normal “healthy people” standards. I love sweets. I ate a Harvest Spice cookie from Sheetz for breakfast for five days straight. It was delicious. I had many healthier options. I am not perfect.

I work in a school setting and last week was our last week of summer before school starts for the year. It is always hectic. It makes me tired. I skipped the gym twice last week in favor of a nap. I am not perfect.

My boyfriend and I are embarking on a huge adult venture. We bought our first house together and are trying to sell my house. Stressful? Absolutely. We have to keep our current house in pristine condition, ready at a moment’s notice for a potential buyer to do a walk through. I cleaned the hell out of my house Friday night for a Saturday morning showing. I considered that my cardio. I am not perfect.

Everything I do, though it may not be perfect, is backed by 100% effort. I do bring it, every single day, Jillian. Whether I am eating that cookie like a ravenous rhino or I am running sprints on the stairmill like I’m part of the Walking Dead cast…you can bet your ass that I’m not letting anything on the table. I’m giving it my all.

And when you stop and step back from your life to really evaluate it, you find that all those little moments that you thought you made bad choices, or you made no choice at all and took a nap instead, really are an integral part of your journey. Those two days off from the gym ended up being so much better for my health than if I’d have gone and pushed through a workout. My body was telling me it was tired, it needed a break. And a nap was just what it needed apparently. I am not perfect.

My goal is a life of perfectly balance moderation. I have always said, “what if I don’t eat that cake today and I don’t wake up tomorrow”? I’d regret having withheld from the treat. So, eat that cookie for breakfast. And I said cookie, singular, not a dozen. There is a difference. Eat that cookie, then push yourself harder during your workout. I can’t guarantee that you’ll work hard enough to burn that cookie off, but if you’re giving it your all, and you feel good, then it doesn’t even matter. And in all honesty, I have been enjoying good food, but I’ve also been enjoying eating chicken and veggies. Remember, it’s all about balance. Yes, I joke that I made bad choices by eating a cookie for breakfast, but I made sure I chose better for lunch and dinner. BALANCE. It’s a beautiful thing.

Last night, I pushed myself during my sprint intervals. I usually sprint for 30 seconds and alternate with a fast walk for 1:30. I ended with 30/30 splits. I had sweat and eye makeup running down my face. I was winded. My legs were on fire. It was perfect.

I woke up this morning and pulled a pair of dress pants out of my closet that had been tight last time I wore them. They got pushed to the bottom of the pile. Today, the waist is a little gapped. It feels perfect.

I’ve finished my breakfast of oatmeal and a protein shake, and I’m already daydreaming of what I’ll eat for lunch. I’m craving a salad, I think. So I’ll be eating a bowl full of fresh veggies, lettuce, and grilled chicken. I can taste it already. It will be perfect.

If you told me that you’ve never made a mistake- never skipped a workout, never cheated on your diet, never played hooky from work to sit in the sun…well then I’d say that I feel bad for you. A life well lived is never done so in a straight line. There will be detours, there will be shortcuts. There will be darkness and light. Some days will be fast, like a blur, while some move at a snail’s pace. And none of it will ever happen as you want it to or even when you expect it. Just enjoy the ride. It will be perfect.