It has been about a month since I’ve written anything for you. I am sorry. Truly. My life has been so busy that I admit, I neglected this page. Now I’m going to tell you why. Prepare to be bored. You’ve been warned.
It all started back around Valentine’s Day. I was offered a new position with the hospital in my town. I accepted said job, gave my resignation, and then the crazy began. You see, I am a creature of habit and when my habitat gets messed up, I become nutty…just ask the fiance. Bless his heart for dealing with my crazy ass the past month! So anyhow, I finished up working at my old job at the end of February and started anew on March 6. What did I realize about this change?
- I am capable of easily transitioning from one nursing arena to another. Going from preschool kids, peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, and the sniffles to cardiology, doctors, and EKGS was actually not difficult at all for me. I thrive on a challenge. And cardiology was my Mt. Everest. I never wanted anything to do with hearts when I was in nursing school, and even when I worked in the ER, I would pass off chest pains and heart issues to coworkers in exchange for other fun stuff like strokes and broken bones. Hearts intimidated me. I have no idea why. I just never learned to love it…and here I am: deep in the HEART of cardiology. I initially interviewed with said hospital and was under the impression that I would be coming on board with surgery or pulmonary. I got a little surprise when I learned neither of those would be my new home. And in typical Chelsy fashion, I panicked. I cried, I might have had small tantrum, and I told myself and the fiance that I just couldn’t do it…I was going to rescind my resignation and just go back to what I knew, what was comfortable. But after some serious reflecting on where I was with my career and where I wanted it to go, I decided to start fresh in a specialty that scared the hell out of me.
- I also learned that changing my schedule by a few hours totally throws my world off kilter. For the past 3 or so years, I have been working 7-3. I loved it. Get up, get things done, and have quite a few hours to do whatever the heck I wanted. And here I was, taking a job where I’d now be working until 5 pm. I know, 2 hours different. My friends and family were certainly annoyed by my incessant crying about having to work later hours. For the first 2 weeks of my new job, I came home miserable. I was dramatic. If you didn’t know it, you would think I was being asked to work until midnight. But to me, the time change was a really BIG CHANGE. But guess what? I’m a month into this new endeavor, and it’s getting easier. I’m getting the hang of cardiology, even though I know I’ve only hit the tip of the iceberg. But I’m learning the ropes and learning a lot from some really great physicians. And I’m getting used to the hours. Working until 5, like half of the people in the world, isn’t so bad. I’ve made changes to my comfortable routine, and I’m starting new routines. And I’m still breathing!
Now, why the hell did I bore you with all of this non-fitness talk? Because it served a point…a long winded one, but still a point. Because of all of this change, this upheaval in my life lately, things got crazy. And I will admit, the first thing I sacrificed was exercise. Sad, but true. I was used to going to the gym every day after work. But new hours, stress of new job duties, etc. had me so exhausted that I would come home and hit the couch. I just had no energy or ambition to get up and get moving.
For the past month, I have been terrible with keeping a gym routine. I was lucky to make it to the gym 2 times in one week. I also let my diet get lax, especially in the evenings. Being tired and drained from the day led to quick and easy dinners, and what’s easier than calling Dominos? And what’s more refreshing than an occasional Blue Moon? I kept my diet great for most of the day, breakfast and work were consistent. But dinner wasn’t always great choices. And by week two of this non-schedule schedule, I started to get nutty. I felt fat, I felt crappy, I felt unmotivated. And I came to realize that my body craved movement, needed some strictness. So I realized that I needed to figure out a new way of doing things. This new schedule was going to require me tweaking my comfort zone, and changing up my workout routine. But it’s all doable. With a little thought and some planning, I got myself into a new groove.
I am not who I was 2 years ago. Not by any stretch of the imagination. I am not prepping meals consistently, I am not working out on a strict schedule, and I have found I might enjoy pursuing new dreams that don’t include any competition prepping. I want to be fit and healthy, but I also want other things. And I am working on balancing the two. The fiance and I have lots of projects in the works and we make time to workout when we can, but I’m learning that I can have a really well balanced life with lots going on..but I’m not sacrificing anything. I can be free to go shopping all day and not worry about packing meals. I can indulge in said Blue Moon because I don’t have to stick to a strict diet plan. I love it. I also loved competing. I love continuing to push my body to become better, healthier, more fit. But I’m learning so much and growing in different ways, and I finally see that I can be healthy without being obsessed. I can skip the gym sometimes without fear that my muscles with wither and die or I will gain 10 pounds. It took me almost two years now to not panic over something like that. Change takes time. Resetting your brain is a process. I now can use my workouts as therapy and it’s become a place to relax, not stress. I actually enjoy cardio now because it’s not required. It’s not written into a plan. Sometimes I even just do cardio when I don’t feel like lifting, or I’m short on time…and it’s OK! I’m doing what makes me happy and I’m reaching for goals and dreams from fitness to business. And I’ve found that this is what it really means to live. My life is far from what I pictured it to be when I was deep into JUST fitness two years ago, but it feels so much fuller now.
So for anyone who’s ever felt a little lost, or struggled with what road to take, then remember this: Do you. Reach for the lofty goals. Be brave. Be ambitious. And DO NOT EVER settle for allowing yourself to be pegged as “just a bodybuilder” or “just a nurse”…or whatever else it is that you think is all you can do. Don’t be a singularity. Do both. Do it all. Because you can. You CAN have it all.
Eat the pizza, drink all the coffee, have tons of fun…and keep on keeping fit!